All my favorite blogs are stale, as in they have not been updated, and I'm bored off my gourd at work, which can be a very dangerous situation. Last time this happened I ended up creating a program that still haunts me to this day. Stupid staff development projects... Yeah, I've got tons of real work to get through, but today I am the 'C' student who is doing just enough to get by. Allright, that'll probably be me tomorrow too. YES, I am a perennial 'C' student, but I can turn into an "honors nerd" at the drop of a hat, so reck-a-nize fools!
-Lamenting about boredom-check
-Egocentric self assessment-check
-Trash talking-check
-No discernable point or reason for writing this crap down-check
This blog entry is coming along swimmingly! OK, I do have something to bitch about, but its bathroom talk. I'll preface this rant with the following information: I lived in a dorm for 4 years, and my bathroom consisted of 4 stalls that was shared by no fewer than 30 other women, and I have spent three summers in the woods where there were no flushing toilets, so I am not a crapper prima donna in the least, however.
-Lamenting about boredom-check
-Egocentric self assessment-check
-Trash talking-check
-No discernable point or reason for writing this crap down-check
This blog entry is coming along swimmingly! OK, I do have something to bitch about, but its bathroom talk. I'll preface this rant with the following information: I lived in a dorm for 4 years, and my bathroom consisted of 4 stalls that was shared by no fewer than 30 other women, and I have spent three summers in the woods where there were no flushing toilets, so I am not a crapper prima donna in the least, however.
What is up w/these crazy bitches?!
I work in an office on a floor with 3 other offices. We all share one ladies room, which has about 9 stalls. I do not understand how, when entering a bathroom and seeing one occupied stall, and 8 other unoccupied stalls, you would zero in on a stall RIGHT NEXT to the stall with someone already in there! Do you need someone to hold your hand through this? Geez! I realize that as an American I am used to a certain amount of buffering space. I'm not used to being pressed up against strangers, like in Japan or India, or bustling through busy, narrow streets like in England or New York, but my credo is: If there is extra space available, get offa my cloud, man! Or in this case, WOman!
Should I kick out my feet from under the stall to give some menacing presence, like some kind of blowfish trying to ward off predators/competitors? That may not work, these nutty ladies might thing its some kind of welcoming flag or an opportunity to play "Rockettes". And it really sucks when someone plops down right next to you- literally. That has actually happened to me! I mean, it's bothersome when someone sits right next to you in spite of the fact that many other stalls are open, but when they start pinching a loaf or passing gas, its just like WHAT THE HELL IS YOUR PROBLEM?! This isn't The Waltons! Were not some snuggly family where we can just share those kind of moments!
I know, "$hit" happens, and I'm sure youre asking what I do when such needs arise. To that I shall remind:
No comments:
Post a Comment