V-Day '07 and Other Egocentric Delights

All in all I'd say it was pretty good. The date had a shaky start, but it went OK. Yes, I got a "first kiss" on V-day (it was our third date, not counting the night that we met, so we were due). No, I didn't have butterflies or a tight chest or any of the other things that I've read/heard of/seen in movies. Just like every other kiss I've ever had, it was all smacking sounds and the smell of spit. (Apologies to _______ and _______, and _______, but I am a truthful gal.) I talked to some women I work with and I've ascertained the following:

1. It's not just a Hollywood notion; a "real" kiss truly does feel wonderful
2. I have felt the whole nervousness & longing thing, but I've always been too chicken-shit to go after it, so while my anatomy & physiology is all good, the psychology could use some work.

Y'know, sometimes I wonder where I would be if my Dad hadn't cheated on my mom, and been so selfish, while I was growing up and forming my opinions of the opposite sex. Would I have carelessly thrown my heart to some ne're-do-well and have kids by now, or would I have been able to trust some great guy and not run away? It doesn't matter now, but I sometimes wish I could get "Scrooged" and see how things would have been if I didn't have such hang-ups with trusting men. Well, maybe I'm being too hard on my Dad b/c it's not like my view would have changed the world I live in because I ALSO learned last night that meskins just don't have it in them to appreciate it when women cook, serve, and feed them. I mean, he liked it in a "since you were at the store already, thanks for picking up a loaf of bread for me.", but not the "WOW! You just spent 2 hours, after working all day, to make me a homemade dinner, complete w/lemon meringue pie from scratch. YOU ARE THE BOMB!" And that's where many of you would say that if someone doesn't appreciate it, you shouldn't do it. But I LIKE to do things for other people! I just want to be worshipped for it, is that too much to ask? J

I will admit that I was a little bummed out b/c I didn't get any V-day cards. I didn't know this but my mom has been sick since Sunday with a stomach virus, so besides some e-wishes (and thank you kindly for those!), I came up short. Not a biggie; I put out so much positive V-day karma this year that I will be shocked if someday my marriage proposal doesn't come via Megatron at the Superbowl. HA HA! (That was like wrapping 4 outlandish fantasies into one fell swoop! Mad skillz, ya'll!) Then I look at the world where children are starving, moms and wives are struggling to keep it together while their sons/husbands are sitting ducks in a hostile foreign country, and drug addicts are getting cornholed for a 20 minute high and I think "Your biggest worry is a two-dollar card? Damn…you are such a weenie!" (And a lucky/loved weenie at that.)

This weekend I'll be watching Pan's Labyrinth w/my cousin (and perhaps the date-man mentioned above), and studying the hell out of algebra since my first exam is on the 21st. Perhps my "kavorka" is wearing off (no prescriptions necessary), but the past two weeks have been quite a trip. Thanks to everyone for their support! E-beer is on me!